in media res

TIL “in media res” is the term for dropping the audience into the middle of the action at the beginning of a story. As a Gilmore Girls fan, I immediately thought, “in omnia paratus,” but that’s neither here nor there.

I tend to feel like I’m still at the beginning of something, even when I’m already down the road apiece. I’ve typically seen that as a negative - why don’t I feel further along than I am? look how far I’ve already come! - but lately, I’m taking it as a sign of high motivation.

It’s a sign that I’m so in the middle of what I’m doing, every next step feels like the beginning of another, small, new thing. Ever growing, ever snowballing.

Good things take time. It’s taken me time, in the midst of a busy life with two (other) part-time jobs and two children to raise, to become capable and to grow in ways I didn’t see coming.

Since 2022, I’ve had some truly life-changing and memorable experiences: some wonderful, some incredibly difficult. I’ve said goodbye (see you later) due to the death of my father, of a good friend, and of a good friend’s child. I’ve sung in choirs twice at Carnegie Hall, published my first choral piece, and written (the songs that will someday result in) my first album of original music. I’ve battled imposter syndrome, lack of motivation, and self-imposed inaction. I’ve picked myself up, dusted myself off, and kept going.

I’m remembering I wrote a poem about this, called “channel.” I’d like to share it sooner than later.

Thank you for sticking with me here! Drop me a line, and we’ll catch up soon!